He has shown you, O mortal, what is good.
And what does the Lord require of you?
To act justly and to love mercy
and to walk humbly with your God.
(Micah 6:8)
This week hasn’t been easy. I almost quit my job on Monday when faced with yet another set of challenges – I feel like every step there is an uphill battle. And while I enjoy a good challenge (ie: look at my life the past few years) if there are no victories then it becomes bone wearying.
I came home from work and had one heck of a good cry. I know if I quit it should be easy for me to find a job but dangit, I know I can do this even though it’s incredibly hard for me right now.
So I sat in the quiet and had a long talk with God. At first it was me pouring my heart out, talking and talking, asking for guidance and help and strength. That if this was a job I was supposed to do then please help me find the resources I need to learn what I need to learn so I could do it 100%.
It took a while – I had quite a lot to say. And finally I sat there, still crying, my head down and was quiet. I just……sat there.
And then I knew that I would be ok. I knew that He had led me to this job for a reason and I needed to trust Him.
I’m still finding my balance at the job. There are still huge challenges. But I’m doing better now because I know I am smart and can figure it out – and I know that God is there for me to lean on when I struggle. It’s easy to feel like I’m alone with this challenge. I keep reminding myself that I’m not – after 30 years of NOT talking to God about this stuff I keep forgetting that I can. Those talks bring me more peace that anything else I could imagine.
I’ve printed the verse from Micah above and have it at my desk to not only remind me of what God asks of us but to remind myself that God is there for me.
I made a commitment to Him when I accepted Him back into my life. He’s always been there for me. It’s time to remember that – and to remember that I should spend more time walking “humbly with (our) God.”